I hate that I let him get to me this weekend. I hate how I let his selfishness, and utter disregard for our children and myself make me sad. I keep getting sucked back into his mind games, realizing it, then sprinting in the opposite direction. I have to stop letting his actions and his words get to me.
For today I am back to my amazing happy self. And though I’ve had more moments of weakness the past few days than I have had in the past month, it’s ok. Because even though it feels like I took ten steps back, I didn’t. I may miss him sometimes or feel like I need him in others, but those moments don’t consume me anymore. They last for a minute and instead of running from them I embrace them. Yes, as crazy as it sounds I embrace my weak moments. I feel them. They kill me but I allow the feeling to engulf my senses and then poof. I let it go and I’m left perfectly fine afterwards.
Gabriel, You have lost your power over me.