Sadness 

I’m at the mall waiting for the stores to open, watching all the older guys and gals walk. It’s rhythmic and soothing. I’ve been having a hard time getting him off my mind lately but it’s ok. It’s expected. With my birthday coming up, I don’t know, I just can’t picture the day without him. We have court again tomorrow. Another day I hate. I think they are going to be discussing whether or not he will be able to see the kids. I sincerely hope he doesn’t have his hopes up. From what I am told by my daughters counselor and the law guardian for the kids the answer is still no. My heart hurts for him and my children. 

Ariana apparently has been telling everyone she doesn’t want to see him. I tried to convince her otherwise but she is so sad about everything. In time she will be ok and want to see him again. 

This whole process has been a waiting game. 

For now I just sit and work on myself, take care of my children and pray. 

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