- I had written the original form of The Monster Inside Me and upon re reading it decided it needed some more details. Let me know what you think?
The monster inside me is roaming tonight through the depths of my mind and soul. I feel it creeping through every inch of me. I feel it crawling its way through each vein, hitting every nerve on it’s way. My insides are churning, trying to fight the demon that lives within. It can’t win.
The monster inside me is free tonight. I struggle to hold myself together, to not let it take over. The demon is free and it is taking over me, inch by inch. I am all consumed and struggling to hang on to the last bit of me that’s left. It’s a tug of war, and the monster is stronger. I can not lose.
The monster inside me is clawing tonight, leaving it’s mark underneath my skin. You can’t get rid of me, it whispers. I cry, and shake in fear and in sadness. My body tenses, and grabs hold of itself hugging tighter and tighter. It’s bad tonight. The darkness is taking over, I can’t find the light. Keep breathing.
The monster inside me is suffocating me. Holding me down to it with a relentless grip that has me squirming from the inside out. It’s killing parts of me without a care. Still I hold on to the last bits of me the darkness hasn’t consumed yet. Not all is black. I must fight.
What do you want from me demon? I whisper to the monster, hoping to distract it from poisoning me any more than it already has. This monster is wise however, and sticks its hooks into me tighter and tighter. I stumble my way to the mirror, to see the marks the monster has left. The thousands of scars I see don’t scare me anymore. I’ve become accustomed to the ugliness the monster leaves in it’s wake. Yet my skin looks pure, untouched, unscathed. There’s no claw marks upon my chest. No burns upon me. I feel them but they seem invisible. Until I look into my eyes. My eyes, the keeper of my secrets, hold the scars the monster loves to leave behind. Deep within their depths you can see each dreadful cut, each black bruise, every single mark the monster has left. I shrug, take a deep breath, and return to my seat. The monster has not won today.
Slowly, too slowly, the monster inside me recedes. Not completely. It lingers and leaves hints of itself throughout me. I feel them. It’s nauseating. The blackness won’t let up. The demon won’t let go. It’s loosened it’s hold for now, only to trick me into a sense of security that it will strip from me at any possible moment. For now, the monster lives inside of me. Slowly leaking and receding itself into my most inner depths. For now, I am somewhat safe. For now I am somewhat calm. For now, I can somewhat hang on. Until the monster comes for me again…