I’m Feeling Sort of Different

Ok. Well if you haven’t read my previous post… I’m pregnant. Yes, I am probably just as shocked as you are, if not more. This pregnancy is completely different from when I was pregnant with my daughter. When I was pregnant with Ariana, I was ecstatic and happy all the time. This time, I’m feeling alone and afraid and unsure and sad. I’m happy. Please don’t get me wrong I am happy and excited and nervous, I just feel like I should be happier and more excited. 

How messed up is it to be happy you’re pregnant but wish it was with anyone OTHER THAN your husband? I’m not sure but that’s how I feel. I was on the road to separation and now I’m stuck at a broken stop light. I don’t know which way to turn and I’m questioning everything. 

Today is my first doctors appointment. I should find out how far along I am and when I am due and I hope to have a sonogram too. We shall see how that goes.

 

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