“To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.” — Gilbert K. Chesterton

I feel so desperate and lost. Hopeless. I’m trying so hard and yet I feel like instead of moving forward I’m constantly taking steps backward. I think it’s close to breaking me. There’s only so many ways to make money. I work. Full time. My husband also works full time. But for a three person family living on Long Island who is already in debt it’s like it’s never enough. Tomorrow is my daughters 2nd birthday. I wanted to take her to adventure land. She would have a blast. But now my husband says we can’t. Every month were spending $360 on a train ticket so he can get to and from work. So now that the first had past and he spent the money yet again Ariana can not enjoy adventure land. We also may cancel her birthday party Sunday. I can’t afford anything. I can’t do much to fix it. I refuse to dance again. But I know if I have to I will.

Life just seems so hopeless. You can get a great job with a degree. But you need money for that degree. Where is the justice in that. Ok I’m ranting. But I needed to vent on how it’s been years almost 10 of me struggling. Paying for mistakes still. When does it end. When can I finally move forward??!

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